i remembered promising myself not to fall in love again because i think ive handled enough damage to myself. i struggled for years trying to fix myself back up, but th emptiness, th pain always comes back around when im all alone with my thoughts and memories over memories of my previous heartbreak. that, was a wake up call. to bring my thoughts back down to reality. that love isnt always sweet and the fact that youre always giving in. love does not work when only one is making an effort and when you find yourself crying more than smiling genuinely. love does not last forever and it can never have a fairytale ending. it will always end with a heartbreak, no matter. because GOD works in so many different ways. i used to believe love is such strong a word to be used ever so easily in conversation. that people would spat th word love easily like its oxygen they breathe in.

but when i met this man. wow. ive felt feelings ive never felt throughout my entire nineteen years living in this world. being the center of his world, being th reason he smiles th moment he sees a text from me in the morning. to be holding out his hands to me th moment im next to him. seeing how much his eyes sparkle when he looked into mine. be th first person he seek for when he's down.

i made him sound so perfect. but our relationship was never a perfect smooth sailing one. from th first time we talked, i think we advanced too fast. honestly, i think i cnt keep up. i know nothing about him and he know little about me. so we slowed down. and began to open up to each other. i learnt to trust man again. he taught me how to fall headoverheels in love. trust, love and fun brought us to places ive never thought we'd arrive. by places i dont mean it in th literal sense.

my life changed when i met him. not all that changes are good. but they arent too bad either. im still struggling to accept th fact that i lost my bestfriend th moment i fell too deep into love. and i being a stubborn girl, i choose not to say sorry for th things ive never done wrong. let's not elaborate. i find out friends that would really stay for th bad, for th worst. and that was a good feeling.

life losing friends was a really hard one. especially when i lost them because i fell in love. becaus ei found a man to be the center of my attention. someone to shower my love to. but guess what. through th tough times, those rough nights, he was there. trust me, he stayed awake almost an entire night as i cried my eyes out, devastated. he kept his silence as i sobbed to my heart content. he did not comfort me with words because he knows. all i need then was company. the fact that he'll still be there when everyone decides to leave. that was really comforting.

and a million a times, he's always telling me, convincing this girl that is scared of losing a gem she found in the mud- he's never leaving. he'll stay no matter. this man is strong. and in so many ways, he'll do his best to protect me from the world.

well now, it's basically me, him against th world. he's one hell of an honest man. he never makes promises he cant keep which lead him to making promises close to none at all. he'll say th truth if he doesnt like it. he'll say compliments only when he meant it. which is almost rare.

and he seldom calls me by my name. so every once a while when he called out my name, it felt really special. my name. "Hanna." he taught me how to cherish even th smallest things.

my parents my sister my granny love him! constantly calling him over and its really nice to see hoe nice he gets along with my family. and it sure is nice when th relationship is blessed. i never have to lie when i go out all the time.

he is the best thing that has ever happen to me yet. and i'll cherish every single moment i have with this man.

and this man goes by th name, "Deen."

let this be known from now on, i'll share almost every moment in my life with him, my family, my friends here on this blog.

this is one hell of a long comeback post.

P.S. my love for leekiseop has never faded.